Timing – When is the Right Time to Divorce?

No one wants to contemplate that their marriage may at some point end in divorce. Most parties fight hard to keep their marriage together, taking important measures such as counseling, or even trial separations. In some cases, these measures will not be enough, and the parties will decide to end their marriage. A common question is when is the best time to actually file for divorce?

One way to decide if the time is right for you to file for divorce may be other sources of upheaval in your life. Are you about to sell the family business? Change jobs? Start a new school program? For many of these issues, filing for a divorce at the exact same time as other sources of chaos and change in your life may simply add too much strain to you and your spouse. The rancor and anger that may come from your spouse when being served with divorce papers may end up disrupting your life even more.    However, these should not be used as excuses to move forward with a divorce if that is truly what you desire.  There is never a “right” time to get a divorce.   

Another way to look at it is how your current home life is impacting your children. Many couples make the mistake of "staying together for the children," but in many cases this may do more harm than good. Children are more than capable of sensing tension and anger between their parents, and seeing constant conflict is not in a child’s best interest. If you know that you and your spouse are heading for divorce, do not hold off on timing just for your child to graduate from high school or move out of the house. Two separate, happy homes is usually better for a child than one home full of discord.

Third, there are some important time restrictions when it comes to spousal support in New Jersey. When considering if it is time for you to seek a divorce, you should carefully discuss the availability of spousal support in your marriage vis a vis the New Jersey statutes and restrictions on spousal support. Similarly, military divorces can involve rights available to one spouse only after the parties have been married for a certain amount of time. These time-length statutes should be reviewed before making a final decision

The decision to divorce is a big one, and you need to understand how timing could play a role.  at (732) 529-6937 for an appointment to talk about your case and strategy.

About the Author


John Nachlinger is a co-founder and managing attorney of Netsquire, a family law firm focused on streamlining divorces through effective mediation, settlement drafting, and court filing assistance. As a New Jersey Supreme Court Certified Matrimonial Law Attorney and Qualified Mediator, John guides couples toward equitable agreements without the cost and stress of litigation.

Recognized as a New Jersey Super Lawyer for over a decade, John’s client-focused approach aims to foster understanding during challenging transitions. With a background spanning top law journals, judicial clerkships, and boutique family law firms, John now applies his analytical skills to create workable solutions for all parties. His mediation services reshape the divorce journey by prioritizing compassion and compromise.

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