Tired woman having a headache sitting at a table in the lliving room with her boyfriend

In a divorce, people can sometimes get caught up in “winning”
and start to fight over every issue. It can be easy to lose sight over
what is really important during the turmoil, especially during a highly
contested divorce. While
, it can sometimes be better to let go of others.

First, any personal property that can be easily replaced may not be worth
fighting over. You may really like the set of end tables in your living
room, but for what you will pay your lawyer to go to court to ask to be
awarded those tables, you probably could have purchased new ones ten times
over. This is not to say that it makes sense to allow your spouse to have
every piece of furniture in the house, but rather to keep in mind what
is the true value of the furniture or personal property. If your spouse
is adamant that he or she be able to keep a particular piece of furniture,
it may be best to let that piece go in exchange for being awarded a different
piece that you particularly like.

Conversely, personal property that cannot be replaced due to a high degree
of sentimental value may very well be worth taking to court. These items
may include such things as a silver set given during the marriage, christening
gowns, a famous piece of art, or heirloom furniture. In short, items that
simply cannot be purchased from a store, no matter the cost.

Children, of course, are most parents’ top priority in divorce. Both
parents want the best for the child, and, naturally, children are definitely
worth the hassle and cost of litigation. The big issues of expanded residential
time or custodianship are often the subject of prolonged litigation for
this reason. That said, the smaller issues could require a higher degree
of flexibility.

Big ticket items are also typically worth taking to trial if an agreement
cannot be reached. These include such issues as the house, a business,
retirement accounts, or life savings. Some clients are eager to get the
divorce over with and may try to end it quickly by just giving the other
spouse the big items. While this may end your divorce without a big trial,
it could have disastrous financial implications for you in the future.
Keep in mind that whatever you give away now just to get done in a hurry,
you can’t take back later. Once the settlement agreement is signed,
it’s final. So make sure it’s something you can live with.

make goals for their futures and decide what is important in their lives.
Contact us today at (732) 479-4711 to talk about strategy, your divorce,
and what’s worth fighting for.

About the Author


John Nachlinger is a co-founder and managing attorney of Netsquire, a family law firm focused on streamlining divorces through effective mediation, settlement drafting, and court filing assistance. As a New Jersey Supreme Court Certified Matrimonial Law Attorney and Qualified Mediator, John guides couples toward equitable agreements without the cost and stress of litigation.

Recognized as a New Jersey Super Lawyer for over a decade, John’s client-focused approach aims to foster understanding during challenging transitions. With a background spanning top law journals, judicial clerkships, and boutique family law firms, John now applies his analytical skills to create workable solutions for all parties. His mediation services reshape the divorce journey by prioritizing compassion and compromise.

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