As I sit by a campfire on a beautiful late August evening, I cannot help but ponder how many divorces could be easily settled in this environment. By the time a divorce has been filed and the parties have backed into their respective corners, it is hard to break down the emotional walls that they have erected to protect themselves from emotional injury. Forgetting that a divorce is often a business transaction, many use the divorce process to extract revenge on their cheating spouse or inferior parent.
We find, all too often, that people are not ready to get serious about a divorce settlement until they feel they have exhausted all of their negative emotions toward their soon-to-be ex-spouse. Many decide to file for divorce while the raw emotion of their reason for divorce is front and center in their mind (i.e., the discovery of an affair or an act of domestic violence). In not allowing these emotions to subside before thinking about the serious business of crafting a settlement, many litigants do themselves, and their children, a great disservice.
As I sit by this campfire, I hear all of the insects and creatures around. I hear the fire crackling. I see the vast expanse of stars, planets and galaxies. It is calm and tension around the fire is low. I cannot help but wonder how many divorce settlements could be reached in this environment. When litigants get out of their perfect constructed bubbles and allow themselves to feel free, they are able to see the forest from the trees and find a way to resolve their dispute without spending all their hard earned assets on attorneys and the legal system.
We believe that divorce should be approached in a manner that decreases emotions, not enflames them. You worked hard for your money; you should not spend it all to get divorced when the outcomes are usually finite and predictable. Let us guide through the process so that you will feel that you are sitting around a warm campfire watching the Moon rise above the trees.
Remember, we will not tell you what you want to hear. We will tell you what you need to know.